Unrelated Pictures

i know some of you probably think i'm lost at sea.  i try not to have blogging dry spells, but the reality is i'm in and out.  both physically and mentally ;)  i just flew in from houston monday morning after  hallie (my bestie-might-as-well-be-my-sister) and i had the luxury of spending a long weekend together at her in-laws home in houston.  we were forced to sleep in, get massages, manis/pedis and shop all alone with out our sweet babies.  it was really hard all around ;)  lest you feel too badly for jon, hallie's husband jason flew to colorado to ski/snowboard with him at copper mountain.  it's a difficult life we lead. sigh.



i've been thinking a lot lately about a saying i learned during our days on staff at an east texas summer camp called Pine Cove. 

"comparison is the thief of joy"

is that not so true? can you not think of about a dozen areas in your life that joy is stolen as a direct result of comparison?  i sure can.  reading other blogs, spending time with other mommies, listening to speakers/sermons, reading books.  maybe you read about me flying to houston with hallie and compared your current situation and were jealous (then again, maybe not :) the reality of it is that jon and i live at minimum 16 hours drive time from a single family member and are raising our kids without family or close close friends anywhere near.  hallie and i did have a really special trip, but that happens once every other blue moon.  in other words, raaaaarely to never. 

when you do what i do at times and compare my current situation with all the fun special things other people seem to be doing or the way other peoples families operate or the particular kids God has given to other parents, i start to get so frustrated with my own life, and my mind starts to go rabbit trailing into doom and gloom.

for example: if i'd read on someone else's blog that they'd had a fun massage weekend with their best friend and their husband's went skiing, i'd start thinking things like...

my best friend and i have never gotten to do that.
i live so far from everyone too.  it stinks. no fair.
we don't have the money to do that.
no one will keep my kids for me to do that.
i wish my best friend were as pretty as hallie (teeheehee).
i don't even have a best friend.
or insert your own million other crazy things.



now why do i bother writing all of that?  well, i've recently heard a counselor describe "taking thoughts captive" (2 corinthians 10:5 "we demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.") in a practical way:

Catch the wrong thought.
Confess the wrong thought.
Change the wrong thought to align your thoughts with the mind of Jesus/ "make it obedient to Christ"

because that can be a pretty obscure idea right?  taking thoughts captive.  but that's the biblical principle behind "comparison is the thief of joy."  so, again, how does this all apply?  well my friend gwyn and i meet thursday mornings at 6:00 am for large coffees and accountability, and we were recently talking about this very subject.  we both felt that we were most frustrated with our children and our families when we were reading or dwelling too long on other people's seemingly perfect families with seemingly perfect children.  we found that just thinking about it was making us frustrated and angry at our own kids im-perfections.  which is completely unfair right?


the battle seems to be: am i going to allow my thoughts run wild and cause me to get more and more unfairly frustrated at my little darlings OR am i going to take my thoughts captive in those moments and love my kids through their being kids with proper expectations of them and loads and loads of grace?  because i don't think the answer is never being on the internet, eliminating all playdates and never reading another book.    




the answer is instead being able to live our lives with joy in our circumstances because of our right view of them.  do i believe that God is the author of my life?  do i believe He works the things of my life together for good because i love him?  do i believe that He's the provider of every good and perfect gift?  and if so do i see my particular children (like it or not ;) as blessings from Him?  if indeed He does those things then i can surely say that comparing my life with another's is a sinful thought that needs to be taken captive and made obedient to Christ.



so i'm working on it.  i'm reading my Bible and praying in order to be filled with the Spirit and know truth.  and my prayer is that i would have wisdom to raise my boys to love Jesus and that the fruit of the spirit would be evident in my being a wife and a mom.  i'm trying to memorize God's word with my boys (more on that later) and hide it in our hearts and i'm reading and studying as much scripture as possible and praying for a hunger for it so that when wrong thoughts pop up i can recognize them and change them, but ultimately so i can live a life that brings glory to Jesus and leads others to Him as well.

because really, that's what it's all about right?  it's not about who was the craftiest mom or who had the cleanest house or the prettiest house.  and it's not about who's children said yes ma'am every time or were able to sit through church the quietest and preferred to read their Bibles over watching TV(praise GOD because i'd be a failure on all accounts!).

instead it is about not eating the bread of idleness and working at mothering with all your heart as unto the Lord and trusting God will use your faithfulness in the lives of your kids and your family dynamic. whether you're homebodies or movers-and-shakers or athletic or musicians or structured or photographers or outgoing or introverts or texans or coloradoans or not.  all for the glory of God.