Dichotomy

today i felt like a dichotomy of sorts.
not only did i buy a lacy coral bra today and paint my toes barbie pink, but i also helped jon unload 13 packages of insulation in our attic.
i often wonder if things like that are normal.
do "normal" girls dig out entire gardens and flower beds and pound in edging and plant seeds?
do "normal" girls buy used fly fishing gear on craigslist instead of new clothes?
do "normal" girls paint every square inch of the walls, cabinets, doors and trim work in their house?
do "normal" girls help blow insulation into the attic for hours?

i'm not saying any of this in any kind of a bragging way.
i honestly just was thinking tonight that maybe i'm actually kind of NOT normal :)
i'm ok with it...but just coming to a realization after all these years.
dad, i blame you.

what started out as, meaghan, "all you have to do is" feed it into the machine, turned into hours of me manually breaking up and feeding in fiberglass insulation.
the kids ate cereal for dinner and heard the phrase, "just go watch another show" more than once.

 

for all parties concerned, i was wearing proper saftey equipment including, but not limited to, the perfect pair of "joey" true religion jeans, hunter wellies, sunglasses and a ski mask (for lung protection).
oh, and pink gardening gloves.

the boys hung around outside long enough to do, what else, but make a sling shot out of bungee cords.

again i ask you, normal?

filthy but finished.
check that one off the list for the next 30 years.

QUIP O'THE DAY
my very first job out of college as a RN was in a pediatric cardiology ICU at children's medical center in dallas.

Torn

every morning, when i'm getting ready, i have a decision to make.

either put on face lotion with sunscreen in it or use regular lotion.

on the one hand, i could save myself wrinkles and have gorgeous skin when i'm in my 60's.

on the other hand, i could have a slight tan and pretty color on my face in my 30's.

it's a big decision.

right up there with whether or not to put sugar in my coffee.

extra calories and great taste? or staying trim and drinking crappy coffee.

as many mornings as i can manage, i make a less difficult decision.

the decision to make the boys stop playing for 15 minutes and sit down for devotions.

people have asked in the past what we do for devos.

i've never gotten around to saying :) but it's not complicated.

i'm a bit anti cheesy themed kids devotionals.

they don't seem to hold their attention, they don't retain much and honestly it's usually just a battle i don't find worth fighting.

so what do we do?

i set a timer for 15 minutes and, while i read my Bible, the boys all look through children's Bibles or jack reads his real Bible.

everyone chills on the couches and chairs in the front living room snuggled under blankets.

i usually light candles and drink coffee.

the only rules are no talking and you must be reading Bible-based literature.

15 minutes is manageable.  long enough for me to actually read something, but not so long they lose interest.

we're more making a habit than cramming them with information.

all of our kids Bibles and story books live permanently on the coffee table.

this is what's left of our "jesus storybook bible"

nobody usually fights me on devo time.
they all start saying how much they love me intermittently while we're quietly reading.
it's awesome.

QUIP O'THE DAY
when i was a kid i would climb up in the door jamb while my mom was using the restroom so i could scare her when she came out.  like, with barefeet all the way to the top of the door.  just hovering there...waiting.

Eight Year Old Privilege

when jack turned 8 it took us a while to figure out what we'd give him for a privilege.
we settled upon something fun thing that he'd also learn alot through.
every friday jack gets one dollar to take into this convenience store right by school to pick out a snack to share with his brothers.

he goes in alone, picks it out, heads to the counter and brings back his change.

we had a BIG chat before he went in the first time (and honestly every time since) about not speaking to anyone, only asking help of a worker in an official shirt behind the counter, not going to the bathroom, coming to the door and signaling if he needs help and making sure it's a snack he can share.

it's been awesome.

turns out, the same guy is always working at that time, and i've had the opportunity to talk to him about what we're doing.
he's had to help jack several times to make a choice he can afford.

as you can see, there are windows along the ENTIRE front of the store so i can see jack pretty much at all times.

see.
i can totally stalk him.

he loves the freedom, the snack and is learning so much.

i "get to" keep the change.
his 8 year old responsibility has been to load the dishwasher after "dinners at the table as a family" which has led to the dishwasher being filled in some very interesting ways.

QUIP O'THE DAY
i hate watching the news (TV in general).

What Kids Are

children are a blessing.

is that your first thought about your kids?  you might actually have just laughed out loud  ;)  i think i get into ruts at times where thinking of the boys as blessings is very far off my radar.

societally, kids are an inconvenience and a nuisance.  abortion is just one confirmation of that.

we roll our eyes when we speak about our kids.  we complain about how hard they are to train.  gripe about making meals and washing clothes and disciplining and spending money on them and on and on.  i can rattle that list off because i do all those things.

i learned a new phrase this summer that has revolutionized the way i think about the boys.

"I GET TO"

i get to....stop and train their hearts towards God.
           ....feed them (all day long ;).
           ....bathe them and dress them.
           ....play with them.
           ....teach them new things.

next time you feel yourself diving off the cliff of frustration about a little person throwing a wrench in your momentary plans, try saying that to yourself.  whatever you were doing, now you get to...  it really does soften your heart.

i can't think of a single place in God's Word that describes children as being anything but a blessing.  that's been hitting me lately.

we should be thankful for them and the opportunities we have through them.  we say we are, but do we really feel that way?  i mean, who else would teach you patience and self-control and dying to self if you didn't have your kids.



finn has gotten two little trophies for playing soccer the last couple of seasons, and he's been begging jon to see all of his trophies.  when jon's parents moved a couple of years ago, we got a rubbermaid full of all his old plaques and trophies and game winning balls and stuff.





they thought it was pretty rad (even though some were for math teehee).

Preschoolin'

we're off to a great start on finn's kindergarten prep.
he'll be fine.
rowan and finn are much more interested in art and crafts and learning than jack was.
it's really fun.
if i can just have finn writing 26 letters by this time next year i think we'll be good...and i'll have saved 100's of dollars in preschool fees ;)







these are the two books we're meandering through right now. 
finn loves them both, and actually begs me to do school with him. right on.

Does It Matter

so every now and again, i find myself in a super snippy place with the kids.  where all of my little annoyances towards them build up, and i start just being grouchy and hard on them.  that was what my yesterday looked like.

this morning neither jon nor i could sleep (NOT normal), and for some reason at 5 am we both decided to pull the trigger and get up and read our bibles.  i was reading a passage in mark 9, i think, where it said Jesus picked up a child "in His arms."  i was trying to picture that and was really struck that that was the first time i'd noticed or thought about Jesus picking up a little kid.  i do that with my kids all the time, and here's Jesus, 30 year old single man, picking up a kid in His arms.

i started thinking about Jesus loving on children and how i wasn't loving mine very well yesterday and what was really annoying me in each of the boys so i listed it out:

jack - constantly making noises, so particular, kinda bossy, never stops talking
finn - stomps when he's mad, cries at the drop of a hat, horrid table manners, whiny
rowan - 2

does it really matter? i wrote across the top of the page.  do those annoying (to me) little things in them really matter.  do i need to be on a full mission to eradicate them from their lives and be harsh in the process? 

i think the bottom line of all of the things on the list are lack of self-control in the boys.  you know what? self control is a fruit of the spirit.  i need to help the boys with these things, but they are areas they will grow in as they mature.  they're IN PROCESS! why is that so hard to remember?

i think the biggest realization was that they bother ME.  they embarrass ME.  ultimately, I am the issue more than they are.

i say all the time to the boys, "know how much mommy loves you?  well, can you believe that Jesus loves you even more than that?  that's a whole lotta love."

it's a good thing.  because as much as i love them.  it's so unperfect.  i'm so thankful that someone else loves them perfectly.

the bottom line for me in thinking this all through, is that i need to persevere with patience.  not give up and let them continue on in their "issues", but show them tons of grace in them.  and get over myself.  and chill out.

and love them.







masterpiece centerpiece



stuffie stack



brother stack

Get on the Train

rowan's riding the potty train.  here we go.  he potty trained fast.  we started at 2 years 4 months.  that's my theory.  3 boys all trained for the most part in 1 day at 2 years and 4 months old.

i've waited until now to really tell anyone how we potty train.  both jack and finn potty trained in one day.  dry at naps.  dry through the night.  day one.

i know, kinda crazy.

i've been reluctant to mention that to all of the moms who struggle with a year long battle of training until i was confident in the method.   now that i've officially had three children all train that easily, i'm ready to reveal.

here's how.



here's the book.  it was written by the same authors who wrote the sleep training material we've used.  it works because the children are used to routine and training and order.

read it.  reread it.  understand it.

i'd say wait until you're sure when you start your child is ready.  i thought all three boys could do it much sooner, but really they needed another month or so.  it's worth it to not start and stop multiple times.  once we go to undies we never use another diaper.  ever.  or pull-up.



one of my favorite things is to take a date with the 2 year old to get all geared up. 

when i'm sure i can completely block off three days or so to do nothing but potty train we kick it off with a trip for goodies.

rowan picked out mickey undies.  i bought a big ole bag of m&m's for a reward (a friend of mine used gummy snacks to limit the sugar and their little one got constipated :-O ), tons of juice boxes and mini sprites (neither of which we EVER buy)  and salty snacks to keep him drinking.

the goal is to have them drink a TON on the big day so there are lots of opportunities to do potty.






ready for accidents.



the distinguishing factor in this method is rewarding for staying dry.  that way the child understands how he's supposed to feel and he gets rewarded for something YOU can control.  asking him if he's dry.  otherwise you're waiting around for them to go potty on their own and you can't reward them until they decide.

it puts the control back in your corner.

and they eat a ton of chocolate.  a motherload.  but hey, it's just for one day really.  then you back off.  if it works, one day of candy isn't gonna kill them.



#2 is the part that hasn't gone quite as smoothly for us.  this is a suggestion in the book for after you've tried poopoo training unsuccessfully, but we just start with it.

on that date for gear and goodies, we let the potty trainer pick out a poopoo present.  after three consecutive successful poos on the potty, they get their present.

we found if we let them pick it, buy it and leave it in the bathroom in the package where they can hold it while they try, but can't play with it until they have success it's really motivating.



jack's was a little thomas train "diesel 10," finn got geo tracks, and rowan wanted "flynn the fire engine."



then we ate chips and drank juice and sprite while watching movies and going potty all.  day.  long.







rowan did great.  we started it's been just over a month since we started, and i don't even think about it any more.  he's done.  the kid potty is back in the storage room, and the m&m's are long gone.

i'd say rowan took a bit more than a day to be completely accident free, like, maybe a week.  mostly because there are two other kids going on and we were lazy about it.

jack probably potty trained him as much as anyone.  he loves his little "fluff ball" and loved taking him potty, giving him candy and cheering him on.





holler if you have any questions.  i have a lot of suggestions and a pretty specific way i do it :)